Have you ever been through a neighborhood or gathering of couples of any kind and noticed how some couples just seem to really fit together naturally while others, may be getting along just fine, but are just functioning and sort of detached from their surroundings? These detached couples may be totally committed to each other because of marriage vows or some other reason but they aren’t as happy as the couples that naturally fit together and possibly never will be.

I do a lot of walking through my neighborhood to try to keep in shape and see couples on the weekends out in their yards either doing yard projects of some sort together and having fun doing it. I use yard work as an example because those types of activities are obvious like any outdoor activity.

I started asking people that I knew, and could discuss relationships with, and without being extremely nosy, about their relationship and how they get along. I found out that the people who have the happiest relationships got to know each other thoroughly before they made any commitments and they took their time getting to know each other. They found that they really liked doing the same things as their partner naturally they just weren’t doing something to please any one they actually wanted to do them. For those people the activities that they engaged in were fun and helped build the relationship even stronger. They even seemed to think alike, a true soul mate.

On the opposite side of the relationship spectrum I had a friend who was extremely active. He liked to go and visit new places and try different things and do physical activities such as, walk on the beach, go hiking, etc. His wife just liked to sleep. She has no interests or desire to really do anything on her days off from work other than sleep. I personally know this couple and you couldn’t meet nicer folks but you can tell that their relationship is lifeless. They first met through a dating service and hit it off well on their first phone conversation so they decided to date. They were getting along together so well on their first three dates that they decided to get married. They barely really knew each other before making such a big decision. He knew shortly after their honeymoon that he may have rushed too fast to the alter when he found out that all she liked to do on the weekends was sleep, sometimes for thirty or more hours each and every weekend. So he ends up doing things alone on his weekends off and they remain together in a functional relationship.

Don’t let this happen to you. It is much better to take you time and get to know your prospective mate before you make any commitments to each other. If one person is not right there is always one that is and you don’t want to be involved with the wrong one when someone you really could get along with comes along. Be especially careful about getting into a relationship because you are lonely. You cannot be objective when you are lonely and could easily make the wrong decision.