Monday, May 18, 2009
Most men want to have more -- or better -- women in their lives. However, they don’t know how to make it happen. Some think it’s about getting more money -- that's wrong. Others think it’s about wearing the hippest clothes -- that's wrong. The most powerful attractor of women is how you are when you’re with them. Check out these 10 ways to become a more attractive guy.
No.10 - Learn how to tell an interesting story about anything
A key aspect to becoming a more attractive guy is being able to tell an interesting story about anything. Interesting stories are like operas and myths -- they have common patterns and a structure you can learn. One of the elements of an interesting story is a protagonist -- the good guy. This works especially well if you make him the underdog who comes back after getting knocked down. Some other elements are conflict, tension, tragedy, and humor. And there’s usually characters that are very different from one another, and who have unpredictable interactions that lead to situations you would have never thought of.
No.9 - Learn Cocky Comedy
One of the most powerful attraction-boosting talents you can develop is something I call Cocky Comedy. It’s about combining cockiness or arrogance with humor. It’s being sassy. It’s saying things that make her jaw drop and making her say “I can’t believe you just said that,” and then hitting you in a playful way. If you want some models of Cocky Comedy, watch James Bond, Clark Gable, Letterman, or Stern. These guys always have a wise-ass thing to say, and as you’re thinking “You’re a bastard for saying that,” you’re laughing. Remember: too much Cocky and you’ll come across as insecure. Too much Funny and you’ll come across as goofy.
No.8 - Make friends with attractive women by becoming a guy who women like being around
One of the best things you can do for your success with women and dating is to make friends -- just friends -- with several women who are like the women you’d like to date. Why? Because having these types of women as friends will teach you how to interact with women like them -- they’ll teach you everything you need to know. And best of all, they’ll bring the women to you.
No.7 - Tease in every way
What does teasing mean? Some people think it means “make fun of her in a mean way.” I don’t mean that. You want to tease psychologically, emotionally and physically, in a way that builds positive responses. If you tease a woman in a Cocky & Funny way, it starts some fun banter -- and that’s a good thing. If you tease a woman by putting your hand on top of hers and touch her hand gently, and she says “that’s nice,” then you take it away. Then every time she says she likes something you stop it -- you’re teasing her, it’s non predictable. When you do something then take it away, you build anticipation. The more you build anticipation with women, the more success you’ll have.
No.6 - Learn the entire mating process of humans in detail
We humans have a predictable set of steps that we go through in mating. From first contact to sex. It’s a predictable process. If you ask women what these steps are, they’ll tell you (you can actually learn a lot from this). If you ask men, they don’t know. Take the time to learn what all the steps are, and how to move from one step to the next, and you’ll have a lot more success than if you don’t
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No.5 - Learn how to read situations before acting or communicating
Women have much more fine-tuned senses and perceptions when it comes to seeing social dynamics and what’s happening between people -- who’s in control, who likes who, who doesn’t have a chance in hell, etc. However, it’s a skill us guys can learn too. If you learn how to read situations and group dynamics, you’ll be able to create results that are nothing short of miraculous.
No.4 - Be honest, ethical and authentic with women - always
I know a guy who uses the idea of being “authentic” to an extreme, and he gets extreme results. He’ll be looking at a woman’s body, just enjoying it un-self-consciously then the woman will turn and ask him what he’s looking at, and he’ll casually say: “Wait, I’m not done yet.” Most guys act in a way that shows they’re ashamed about their desires. But when you act directly, it gives you great power. Extreme? Yes. Effective and fun? Double yes.
No.3 - Set a boundary as soon as possible
If a woman does something that’s unacceptable, set a boundary immediately. Let’s say you’re at a bar, and a woman you’re talking to says: “Hey, keep talking to me because there’s this guy I was talking to just to get a drink, but now he’s following me around.” Tell her that’s not cool, it’s not cool to use guys. Let her know you respect yourself as an individual and that you don’t’ accept behavior or people who are below your standards.
No.2 - Look past the "content" to see the true meaning of what's going on
As I’ve studied male and female interaction, I’ve realized something: Most of the words and gestures of communication are all distraction. What is one of the key skills an illusionist must learn to be effective? Artful distraction. They distract you so they can do something that will then appear to be magic. Most words and stories are just distraction. So when you’re interacting with a woman, always ask yourself: “What’s really going on here?” For example, if a woman shows up all dramatic, instead of getting yourself caught up in the content, step back and realize it’s just a reflection of her personality. Then decide if that kind of woman is a good fit for you or not.
No.1 - Engage her emotions and her body, not so much her mind
Approaching a woman on a logical plane to turn her on is a losing game. Trying to use logic to become an interesting and attractive guy just doesn’t work. It’s the old Russell Crowe sitting down at the bar in A Beautiful Mind and saying: “In essence, we’re just talking about fluid exchange, so let’s skip all the small talk and just hit it.” It doesn’t work that way. So how do you engage her emotions? You do things that are fun and adventurous. You tell stories that capture her heart and her mind. You learn how to touch a woman and what turns a woman on. Take the time to learn, and you’ll be rewarded with a lifetime of success with women.
very nice info...
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